Making new friends when you move somewhere new as an adult is notoriously hard, and sometimes it can feel even trickier to get tapped into your local queer network. That’s why we’ve compiled our tips on how to find new queer friends when you just moved in last week (or last year!).
Get to know yourself and your hobbies to connect better with new queer friends
It might seem counter-intuitive, but one of the best ways to make new local LGTBQ+ friends is to feel comfortable spending time doing things alone.
Connect with your hobbies by seeing movies, making art, or getting into a new sport – it’s easier to make meaningful relationships with people when you’re confident about how you like to spend your time.
Find your ‘third place’ and become a regular
There’s a concept people talk about called the third place – we have our workplace and our homes (e for WFH folks), but it’s important to find another place where you can be at ease & interact with other humans. We’re social creatures and crave connection, and even a little idle small talk can go a long way in making you open for new relationships!
Bring the latest queer fantasy novel to a coffee shop, take a pottery class, get a library card, find some sliding scale yoga classes in your neighborhood – whatever it is, become a regular! As faces become familiar, your weeks will be filled with more friendly smiles (and someone might see what you’re reading and ask you to join their queer book club ??).
Put yourself out there with apps like Lex to connect with your local queer community
When you’re feeling ready to meet some people, download an app like Lex to connect with other local queer people. Lex gives you a chance to connect over interests first rather than looks like some other apps.
Be bold and reply to someone’s post or write your own! You can post saying what you’re looking for – maybe a friend to go to that yoga class with you, or someone to see the latest queer horror flick with!
Join a club with local LGBTQ+ friends on Lex (or start your own!)
If you’re looking to find a crew, try finding a group chat on Lex that aligns with your interests or hobbies. There are queer basketball clubs, book clubs, group chats that connect over identities like queer Black parents, demisexuals, queers over 40. You name it, Lex has it!
If you can’t find a group chat in your area that gets you excited, make your own! You can post in the feed to gauge interest and then take the plunge.
Know that you’re not alone
There’s a loneliness epidemic – so know that if you’re having a tough time meeting new people, you aren’t on your own. Other people are out there looking for connection just like you. Keep putting yourself out there, because queer friendships can be some of the most enriching relationships ??
A: Making friends in a new city can be tough, but it’s totally doable, especially within the LGBTQ+ community! Start by doing things you love solo, like catching a movie or trying out a new hobby. You’ll feel more confident and ready to connect with others who share your interests.
A: Think of your ‘third place’ as your go-to spot outside of work and home where you can kick back and chat with folks. It could be your local coffee shop, a cozy library, or even a fun yoga class. Being a regular there can lead to some awesome spontaneous hangouts!
A: Apps like Lex are great for meeting cool queer folks based on shared interests rather than just looks. Dive into the app, browse posts, and don’t be shy about replying to someone’s invite or posting your own. Whether you’re into yoga or scary movies, there’s someone out there waiting to hang!
A: Absolutely! There are tons of clubs and online groups for every interest within the LGBTQ+ community. On platforms like Lex, you’ll find group chats for things like book clubs or chats for specific identities, like queer parents or demisexuals. And hey, if you can’t find one you love, start your own and see who’s interested!
A: You’re not alone! Lots of folks feel a bit lonely when they’re trying to make new connections, especially in a new place. Hang in there and keep putting yourself out there, whether it’s at events, online, or just striking up a convo with a friendly face. Building friendships takes time, but it’s worth it for the awesome connections you’ll make in the LGBTQ+ community!
